Relationships | 100 Words

Sometimes, It’s Best Not To Ask

October 18th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

‘How are you, Mary?’ said Sanborn’s mother …

‘Fine.’ said Henry’s mother …

They pulled away …

‘Fine?’ said Henry.

‘Well, what should I tell her? his mother said quickly ‘That I sat in my son’s hospital room for six hours, and he didn’t move once?’
Trouble by Gary D. Schmidt

Trouble by Gary D. Schmist is one of my favorite books. I enjoy the deep characters and well-constructed plot, but I can say that about many books. As I said in an earlier post, (see here), I learned the perspective of people overwhelmed with circumstances and grief. The reply “Fine” means “Please don’t ask questions I can’t or don’t want to answer.”

Asking questions seems the caring, sensitive thing for friends and family to do. However, as a relative currently walks through hard times, she sees these questions as intrusive and depressing. I’ve heard others in difficult circumstances say the same. They prefer that people wait for information to be volunteered.

What words can be said while we wait?

I love you.

You are in my thoughts.

I’m praying for you.

Is there anything specific I can do to help right now?

May God grant us much wisdom.

God's Faithfulness, Relationships

God’s Truthfulness

October 4th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind.
Numbers 23:19a (ESV)

These days, what I’m learning along the way is a deeper appreciation of God’s attributes. (See here and here.)

I spent too much time around a couple of liars. Charming little liars who can tell lies that seem plausible. They’ve not only kept me guessing which course to take but have also convinced others to take the wrong course. Troubled has abounded.

Of course, God doesn’t keep me guessing if he is telling the truth or convince me to take the wrong course. I’ve known that so long that I take God’s truthfulness for granted. However, as I experienced the opposite too many times for too many days, my appreciation for God’s character was awakened and deepened.

As my concern and frustration were laughed off—apparently, telling lies is an innocent, routine way of having fun—I also appreciated that God takes truth seriously.

The LORD detests lying lips, but he delights in people who are trustworthy. Proverbs 12:22 (ESV)

Relationships

Secret Sorrows

August 9th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Longfellow’s words reminded me of a member of our church, whom I barely knew. She gave me the cold stare whenever she passed. What had I done? I didn’t dare ask.

Eventually, we were in the same Bible study. She was cordial, but there was no warmth. One Sunday, I decided to probe. Had I offended her? No. She was surprised by my question, and yet not. Another church member had recently asked the same question.

She wondered,

What does my face show if people think I am mad at them?

Longfellow’s words also reminded me of something my brother told me when he entered high school the Fall after I graduated. Someone said,

Oh, you’re the brother of that unfriendly girl.

Back then, I was shocked. I had friends, but I wanted more. Perhaps, my shyness was misinterpreted? Now, I think it was my sadness. I had too many responsibilities and concerns with little support during my high school years.

Perhaps you know someone who is sad?

Friendship, Relationships

Another Goodbye

July 5th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

Easter morning 2023 with one of my dearest friends

When people die it doesn’t necessarily mean you’re ready to give them up.
C.A. Belmond

I didn’t want to give up Tina, but unlike my previous loss (see here), the imperfect words have been said.

I met Tina almost twenty-five years ago, but it wasn’t until the summer of 2021 that we started saying all the imperfect words to each other. As we stood at the back of our church sanctuary one Sunday, Tina told me something vulnerable from a place deep within her heart. A different friendship began with that conversation.

While our husbands ran half marathons together, Tina and I walked or rather “talked” the 8Ks. Now we said more. As we went deeper, I never worried about how I phrased something. I could just speak. Tina did not judge or give careless advice. She listened well. She responded with prayer.

Along with our imperfect words, Tina and I also spoke the perfect ones. I love you.

As I long for more, I rest in the knowledge that Tina is with the Lord. One day our conversations will continue.

Let’s keep sharing our words with our loved ones.

Relationships

The Whole Truth Pt. 2

May 31st, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

Do you solemnly swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth under the penalty of law.
Oath for sworn Testimony

Since I wrote about telling the whole truth (see here), I’ve taken the oath and testified in a court of law.

In preparation for testimony, I learned which statements are allowed in the courtroom.

Hearsay is not truth. I cannot testify about what someone else said.

Speculation is not truth. I cannot testify based on my guesses, deductions, or inferences.

I was asked a question about a matter in which expertise was required. I had no expertise and could only speculate, so I declined. I was next asked about my observations and could comply.

Courtroom protocols are worthy of remembering outside the courtroom. (My husband would agree because I do like to speculate.) Equally important, I am more equipped to deal with opinions disguised as facts. (See here.)

That’s hearsay.

That sounds like speculation.

Do you speculate as much as I do? (Of course, to answer, you have to speculate about how much I speculate.)