Category: Relationships

Book Recommendations, Friendship, Relationships

Community Over Competition

November 22nd, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

When I watch Olympic events, I’m always struck by the camaraderie among the women swimmers and gymnasts. After finishing their event, competing athletes congratulate—even hug—the women who took their podium position. USA gymnasts Simone Biles and Jordan Chiles even bowed to Brazilian Rebeca Andrade during the 2024 Olympics award ceremony after Andrade outperformed them to take the gold medal in Floor Exercise.

Interviews reveal admiration rather than trash talk. It looks genuine. Is it?

Olympic champion Katie Ledecky confirms that it is.

Women are amazing at lifting each other up, at giving a kind word when someone has a great race, providing feedback on a particular technique, or commiserating  … The truth is women athletes have way bigger fish to fry than each other.

Katie Ledecky, Just Add Water

Unlike team sports, gymnasts, swimmers, and runners train with athletes from different countries. Being in the trenches together builds bridges and solidifies friendships.

This Thanksgiving, I give thanks for the women in my life whom I have “trained with” and have chosen community over competition. I give thanks for our hard seasons together where solid friendships have been built.

Who is lifting you up? Whom are you lifting up?

Relationships

Safe Relationships

November 15th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

I asked myself, ‘Who is safe? and I thought of you.’

A Friend Dealing with Abuse and Trauma

Over the years, there are attributes I’ve wanted to have, and I’ve occasionally been told I have them. However, I never thought about safe until my friend labeled me.

Who are safe people?

Lindsay Lohan said people who will not take her family’s photo without permission are safe. Another woman said people who are pushy are not safe. My friend defined “safe” as someone who would not doubt her story, not judge her actions, and carefully handle her secrets.

How did my friend decide I was safe? I’m not sure. We were only causal friends the day I was contacted. However, she was the best friend of a dear relative who had passed. Did that trust carry over to me? Perhaps, I’ll ask her one day.

Ultimately, all safety depends on God.

In peace I will both lie down and sleep; for you alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety.

Psalm 4:8 (ESV)

May we all be safe as we gather for the holidays.

Book Recommendations, Relationships

Sometimes, It’s Best Not To Ask

October 18th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

‘How are you, Mary?’ said Sanborn’s mother …

‘Fine.’ said Henry’s mother …

They pulled away …

‘Fine?’ said Henry.

‘Well, what should I tell her? his mother said quickly ‘That I sat in my son’s hospital room for six hours, and he didn’t move once?’

Trouble by Gary D. Schmidt

Trouble by Gary D. Schmist is one of my favorite books. I enjoy the deep characters and well-constructed plot, but I can say that about many books. As I said in an earlier post, (see here), I learned the perspective of people overwhelmed with circumstances and grief. The reply “Fine” means “Please don’t ask questions I can’t or don’t want to answer.”

Asking questions seems the caring, sensitive thing for friends and family to do. However, as a relative currently walks through hard times, she sees these questions as intrusive and depressing. I’ve heard others in difficult circumstances say the same. They prefer that people wait for information to be volunteered.

What words can be said while we wait?

I love you.

You are in my thoughts.

I’m praying for you.

Is there anything specific I can do to help right now?

May God grant us much wisdom.

God's Faithfulness, Relationships

God’s Truthfulness

October 4th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind.

Numbers 23:19a (ESV)

These days, what I’m learning along the way is a deeper appreciation of God’s attributes. (See here and here.)

I spent too much time around a couple of liars. Charming little liars who can tell lies that seem plausible. They’ve not only kept me guessing which course to take but have also convinced others to take the wrong course. Troubled has abounded.

Of course, God doesn’t keep me guessing if he is telling the truth or convince me to take the wrong course. I’ve known that so long that I take God’s truthfulness for granted. However, as I experienced the opposite too many times for too many days, my appreciation for God’s character was awakened and deepened.

As my concern and frustration were laughed off—apparently, telling lies is an innocent, routine way of having fun—I also appreciated that God takes truth seriously.

The LORD detests lying lips, but he delights in people who are trustworthy. Proverbs 12:22 (ESV)

Relationships

Secret Sorrows

August 9th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Longfellow’s words reminded me of a member of our church, whom I barely knew. She gave me the cold stare whenever she passed. What had I done? I didn’t dare ask.

Eventually, we were in the same Bible study. She was cordial, but there was no warmth. One Sunday, I decided to probe. Had I offended her? No. She was surprised by my question, and yet not. Another church member had recently asked the same question.

She wondered,

What does my face show if people think I am mad at them?

Longfellow’s words also reminded me of something my brother told me when he entered high school the Fall after I graduated. Someone said,

Oh, you’re the brother of that unfriendly girl.

Back then, I was shocked. I had friends, but I wanted more. Perhaps, my shyness was misinterpreted? Now, I think it was my sadness. I had too many responsibilities and concerns with little support during my high school years.

Perhaps you know someone who is sad?