Relationships | Page 2 of 12

Answers Rather than Questions

May 23rd, 2026
Mollie T. Cox

He always has an answer, but I’ve never heard him ask a question.

This observation about a church leader impacted someone who later shared it with me. I’ve never forgotten it either.

I thought about those words when my doctor causally said, “You might want to think about walking or swimming,” as he exited the examining room. At that time, I was walking daily and swimming twice a week. Are you exercising would have led to more helpful advice.

I’ve thought about people giving me answers rather than asking me questions the times I was told how to deal with a situation that didn’t exist. Or to try a solution I had tried many times.

And then I caught myself doing the same. I opined on a situation that needed my questions rather than my quick advice.

For three years, our family has walked with loved ones through trying times. Not only did they need help, but so did we. Advice has abounded, but I am grateful for those who asked questions first.

After three days they found him in the temple, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. Luke 2:46

Decisions, Relationships

Planning Ahead

April 18th, 2026
Mollie T. Cox

Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit—yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring …
James 4: 13-14a

I’m an economist, so I know profits are unpredictable. I don’t depend on economic certainty. However, I wish I had known that as my peers and I age, too much becomes unpredictable. Right now, I have unkept promises to others. You know who you are. Please know you are not forgotten..

I have outstanding invitations to my home. Crises intervened, and when the dust settled, I found myself exhausted. Both an excuse and a reality.

Repeatedly, I announced “This is the year of Christmas card.” It didn’t happen for five years. During that time, two friends passed and three sold their homes, so cards were returned undelivered.

Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.
Matthew 6:34 (ESV)

Do not be anxious is familiar. What I’m learning along the way is Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

Book Recommendations, Parenting, Relationships

A Fresh Start: Gordon Korman

April 4th, 2026
Mollie T. Cox

Gordon Korman is one of my favorite authors. I binge read his books after I discovered them. (See here and here.) My friend Barb recently reminded me of my favorites, The Unteachables and Restart.

In the aftermath of celebrating Easter, The Unteachables and Restart would be good family read alouds for those ten and older. While not explicitly Christian, they explore two good questions: What does it mean to forgive and be forgiven? What does it mean to have the opportunity to start a new life?

In The Unteachables, teacher Zachery Kermit was shunned and relegated to the worst classrooms after an eighth-grader’s folly. Twenty-seven years later, Mr. Kermit’s former student repents, seeks to make amends, and be forgiven. His teacher resists while simultaneously helping his current students rise above injustices done to them.

In Restart, Chase has amnesia after falling off a roof. Why is his stepsister afraid of him. Why do classmates avoid him? As Chase’s memory returns, he is appalled he was a bully and wants to change.

Although the themes are serious, the creative plots and memorable characters entertain and lead to great discussions. Can we forgive the deep hurts inflicted on us and by us?

God's Faithfulness, Relationships

Relationship Scorekeeping

March 28th, 2026
Mollie T. Cox

I know someone who keeps score in her relationships. You only get one strike before you are out unless you have money or connections. She not only admits it, but she also believes it is right. I’m in her circle right now, but I know my position stays precarious because her standards are high—standards she can’t even meet.

Thankfully, God deals in grace rather than points.

But if it is by grace, it is no longer on the basis of works; otherwise grace would no longer be grace.
Romans 11:6 (ESV)

If God set standards he couldn’t meet, I would not only be irritated but also angry. Like immutability and truthfulness (see here and here), I didn’t fully appreciate God’s perfection in meeting his own standards—and giving me grace when I didn’t meet them—until I experienced the antithesis. I may not always be learning more along the way, but what I have already learned keeps going deeper.

The Rock, his work is perfect, for all his ways are justice. A God of faithfulness and without iniquity, just and upright is he.

Deuteronomy 32:4 (ESV)

Relationships, Winter

Stripped Bare

March 21st, 2026
Mollie T. Cox

My parents purchased their newly-built 1959 house in a subdivision that had once been a farm. The result? A lack of neighborhood trees. The squirrels I saw in my grandparents’ Tennessee backyard—attracted by my grandparents’ large oaks—were exotic to me. As a child, I thought squirrels didn’t live in North Carolina.

Perhaps my lack of childhood trees led to my extra attentiveness to the trees during a 1984 Thanksgiving trip to Pennsylvania. And the fact that I was embroidering a winter scene of bare trees while my husband drove. Miles and miles of trees stripped bare made a beautiful memory.

Decades of enjoying trees striped bear of their leaves

have shown me beauty,

struggles for resources such as sunlight,

hidden treasure,

and unexpected twists and turns.

The same has been true with the people in my life. As the adornments in their lives are stripped bare by age and circumstances, their beauty, struggles, twists and turns, and hidden treasure have been exposed.