100 Words

Living Outside My Comfort Zone

January 11th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

All growth starts at the end of your comfort zone.
Tony Robbins, Author

I don’t know about growth, but along the way I learned that comfort awaits me at the end of my comfort zone.

It seems like I spend most of my time outside my comfort zone, but I’m not forced. I get myself into it.

Within hours of learning that my grandfather was lingering in a hospital, I flew to his side and sat with him minutes before his death. I despised both flying and leaving my small children, but I was blessed.

I volunteered to fly to Brazil and care for four small children for two weeks while my cousin sought medical treatment in Texas, and her husband worked during the day. I didn’t speak Portuguese or know anything about Ipanema. Two years later, my husband returned with me because I wanted him to experience the culture and natural beauty I found.

I didn’t want to testify in a court of law, but I volunteered because I loved the victim, and I knew I was needed. I received peace in the process and the joy of participating in victory.

And comfort through them all.

How’s your comfort zone these days?

Memories, Parenting

Our Children’s Memories

January 4th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory.
Dr. Seuss

My husband and I have spent a lot of time with our children. We’ve said a lot of things to them as well. Which activities and words were important? According to Dr. Seuss, the moments my children remembered.

Unfortunately, those moments are not always the ones I remember. These days, I’m surprised when my memories coincide with my sons’ memories.

“I don’t remember that” was my mother’s worse response to my vivid recollections. I vowed that I would remember what my children shared until I didn’t.

I’ve read that if you ask children from the same household to describe their childhood, you will get vastly differing accounts. My sister’s memories of our childhood compared to mine are consistent with this statement. Now I understand it wasn’t the overall experience that differed but rather our key moments.

What do I wish I had known? To slow down and think instead of rushing responses and experiences. The totality of a vacation is not as important as a remembered moment during a day.

May we all make the most of our 2025 moments.

Christmas, Relationships

The Gift Of Listening

December 28th, 2024
Mollie T. Cox

Friends are those rare people who ask how we are, and then wait to hear the answer.
Ed Cunningham

If Cunningham is right, then I had a treasure trove of friends in 2024.

Tina, who sat with me on the church sofa and listened while I talked.

Katie, who drove to my house for tea and prayer and listened while I talked.

Barb, who drove me to class and listened while I talked.

Kathy, who sat on my patio and listened while I talked.

Sara, who sat with me in her car and listened while I talked.

Beth, who phoned and listened while I talked—as she has for over sixteen years.

My mother-in-law who was always glad to hear from me and listened while I talked.

Aunt Shirley, the only aunt who listened while I talked rather than talking while I listened.

My husband, who sat up past his bedtime to listen while I talked.

And more who crossed my path less frequently.

Why is listening such a gift?

Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. … When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand.
Karl Menniger

May we all listen and be listened to in 2025.

Christmas, Memories

Returning to Former Places

December 21st, 2024
Mollie T. Cox

At a recent banquet, one speaker urged his listeners to revisit places of former years—not literally, but rather as a mind exercise. His words immediately brought forth a memory of former years as well as a memory of a visit to that place decades later.

In the 1990s, during a rare trip to my grandparents’ home, I stood in their front yard one late night and was ambushed by the pungency of the honeysuckle growing in their far backyard. That smell immediately evoked a 1960s image of my mother, aunt, and grandparents drinking coffee and talking around a concrete table while my siblings and I chased fireflies and listened to their comforting, adult conversations.

Almost another thirty years have passed, and that memory of a memory is still with me. I’m not sure why it lingers or why it means so much—maybe even more than the original memory of evenings I loved before air-conditioning kept us indoors.

However, I’m glad for both the urging and permission to return to former places—whether literally or in my mind—especially during the holidays when I might be ambushed again.

May only good memories sneak up on you this Christmas.

Christmas, Parenting

The Christmas Generation Gap

December 14th, 2024
Mollie T. Cox

Along the way, I learned that Christmas traditions are outgrown. When my sons sat in the car instead of helping choose our Christmas tree—they claimed it was too cold—I was dismayed. I thought my high schoolers had turned into Scrooges until I remembered my mother’s disappointment when I said, “I’d rather get back to the dorm. Decorate the tree without me.”

When my sons were no longer interested in seeing the White House Christmas tree, I remembered my father’s disappointment when he said, “Pilot Life has its Creche displayed. Who wants to go see it?” and my siblings and I declined.

Eventually, my sons will grow old enough to return to the festivities they enjoyed when they were younger. Until then, the generation gap amuses me.

Exciting for the young and old—not those in between

Along the way, I also learned that my sons’ return will be on their terms. I mustn’t mind when they dismiss the Festival of Lights with my husband and me and then plan a similar outing in another city with their dates. (This really happened.)

P.S. My children never outgrew Christmas food or Christmas worship services.