Homeschooling | 100 Words

Underestimating the Gap

September 7th, 2024
Mollie T. Cox

What happens if your friend lives 200 miles away, but both of you think the distance is 100 miles, and you agree to meet halfway?

What happens if you both decide to drive another twenty-five miles after not seeing each other at the fifty-mile mark?

What happens if you both decide to drive another fifteen miles before giving up?

You will never meet your friend, but both of you will think that the other reneged. You will think you gave 90% while your friend did not give 10%. The relationship will be damaged.

I heard this illustration when I was newly married. I was working full-time and working on my doctoral dissertation part time. My husband was working part time and writing his doctoral dissertation full-time. The gap between our actual free time—for family, friends and volunteering—and our perceived free time was large.

While a map can settle location misperceptions, it can’t prove time, emotional or ability gaps. The only solution is extending goodwill. These days, as I give my “90%” and lament others’ lack of “10%,” I try to remember that I am probably misinformed.

Have you tired of giving your “90%” while others give their “10%”?

Homeschooling

Just Another way of Educating

August 31st, 2024
Mollie T. Cox

When I started homeschooling in 1991, it was not a prevalent method of educating children. I wasn’t in uncharted waters, but rather recently discovered waters—full of hope and promises.

Along the way, I learned that homeschooling is just another way of educating children. It has advantages over public and private education, but it also has its downfalls. To think otherwise is naive.

Homeschooling brings families closer. Yes, because children share common experiences, friends, and curricula. No, because family members have greater opportunities and time for conflict.

Homeschooling produces better-educated children. Yes, because special interests and needs of children can be accommodated and information is covered more efficiently. No, because limited resources, illnesses, disobedient children, and needs outside the family have a greater impact on learning.

Children prefer the freedom of homeschooling. Some do. Some don’t.

Homeschooling allows flexibility. Yes, because holidays, travel, and working around family needs are easier. No, because homeschooling requires a workload that can only be met by adhering to a schedule—especially when educating multiple children.

Any parent can homeschool. Yes, because homeschooling doesn’t require special skills, training, or intelligence. No, because homeschooling requires energy and stamina.

God bless the students in your lives.

Art, Homeschooling, Parenting

Picture Books As Art

July 13th, 2024
Mollie T. Cox

There is an opportunity with children to show them art and illustration that will furnish their minds with beauty and mystery, symmetry and wonder. The simplest mechanism for this is the selection of picture books that we share with them.”
Meghan Cox Gurdon, The Enchanted Hour

Along the way, I learned that stories not only have a lasting impact, but also their illustrations. My grown sons have asked for the titles of favorite picture books based on their illustrations: the large flashlight; the black Scottish terrier; the boy wearing a blue sweater.

We didn’t read *Angus* as much as *Titch*, but my preschooler still remembered the terrier over thirty years later.

The impact of picture book illustrations has given me a way to start art conversations with children. Make Way for Ducklings by McCloskey, Mr. Gumpy by Birmingham, Round Trip by Jonas, Piggins by Yolen, and Old Bear by Hissey are among my favorites.

These illustrations help teach the use of line, the power of basic shapes, and the variety of art media and styles.

Thankfully, Massachusetts and Ohio have museums celebrating the art of picture books.

Do you remember any illustrations from childhood?

Homeschooling, Parenting, Relationships

None of My Business

May 11th, 2024
Mollie T. Cox

The most important advice I would give my younger writer self is what I’d give my younger woman self: What other people think of you is none of your business.
Anne Lamott, author

I’ve read this quote multiple times, and it still hits me the same way. “Of course” followed by “No way.”

I eventually have to remember that seeking advice and seeking approval are not the same. While I may need counsel, if I don’t need approval, then I don’t need to know if I have obtained it.

In the past, other’s opinions have paralyzed me or led me off course. Realizing that another’s approval or disapproval—of my parenting or my homeschooling or other aspects of my lifestyle—is none of my business is freeing.

These days, if I suspect my writing or actions will upset someone, I try to remember “What other people think of me is none of my business.”

Thank you, Anne.

Homeschooling, Parenting

Learning New Standards

March 2nd, 2024
Mollie T. Cox

Along the way, I learned that I was more outdated than I thought.

When I reviewed homeschool portfolios for my county school system, some parents showed me work that demonstrated their children were below grade level. It was usually accompanied with “My kids know much more than I did at their age.” Unfortunately, that didn’t mean they were excelling.

I knew my childhood and education were not a gauge for current expectations. When my oldest was starting high school. I attended conferences and listened to cassette tapes about college admissions—no podcasts back then. We were on track with an accelerated education. However, by the time my sons applied to college, I learned we had been hanging on. Standards had risen exponentially in four years.

A wonderful education was received at this college.

What if I had known? Would I have pressured myself and my sons? Would we have lowered our college expectations? I don’t know. Either would have been detrimental and unnecessary because my sons were admitted to their first-choice colleges and received scholarships.

What I do know is that keeping up is hard. Discerning when it doesn’t matter is even harder.