100 Words

What I Always Needed

December 30th, 2023
Mollie T. Cox

I have received “check-off” gifts—i.e. I checked you off my list.

I have received gifts I wanted enough to request.

I have received gifts I would have requested if I had known they existed—and would be bought.

And I have received “What I Always Needed” gifts—the best kind.

I once filled a small box with paper of various types, colors, and sizes. I added child safety scissors and wrapped the package. I presented it to my three-year-old nephew, who opened his present, sighed deeply, and declared, “What I always needed.”

He cut for hours. My husband and I remembered for years. We still repeat Jamie’s words.

Which were the gifts “I Always Needed?” Those that reached a deep place in my heart.

One was an email from a long-distance, childhood friend. She included details about how much I meant to her, but her ending meant the most. “I always prayed you would be happy.” (See here)

Six were inscriptions in school yearbooks. They were unexpected, nourishing words from teachers and friends. Almost fifty years later, I still reread them.

Some were from you, Readers.

How were your gifts this year? Any that “You Always Needed?”

Family, Holidays

Why? It’s Tradition

December 23rd, 2023
Mollie T. Cox

Before I had children, I said things like “Wouldn’t this be a nice tradition when we have children?” I didn’t know that traditions are unplanned.

The first day of our first beach trip, our sons made a late-night run to the grocery store. I gave them a list, but they had discretion. First-day, late-night grocery runs at the beach as well as purchasing unnecessary items became a “tradition.”

The evening before my sons took their first College Board Advanced Placement tests, my youngest wanted a new pen. Buying a new pen at Wal-Mart the evening before an Advanced Placement test became a “tradition.” Purchasing a pen sooner or at a different store would violate “tradition.”

Christmas morning—minutes before we gather to exchange gifts—my sons scramble to wrap the presents they are giving. Days earlier, I suggest that presents should be wrapped. I remind. I have even said, “Pretend it’s Christmas morning and wrap your presents.” My husband finally told me, “Forget it. Wrapping presents on Christmas morning is a tradition.”

Along the way I learned that traditions are events you either couldn’t stop or didn’t stop from continuing.

What are your unplanned traditions?

Christmas, Relationships

Too Good To Be True Pt 2

December 9th, 2023
Mollie T. Cox

Never compare your insides to everyone’s outsides.
Anne Lamott

One year, two Christmas cards were returned to me. I googled the addresses and both houses had been sold. Both couples were empty nesters—one new and one old. Had they downsized?

After more searching—including using my sister’s Facebook account—I discovered that one couple had divorced. I thought they were an incredibly happy couple with well-adjusted adult children. According to their previous Christmas letter, all family members were pursuing their dreams. I didn’t know that one person dreamed of a divorce.

The trail of the other couple was cold. Given the other news, I feared the worst. I eventually learned my friends had bought a bigger house—the better to hold new in-laws and future grandchildren.

I have learned that people or families or marriages too good to be true are too good to be true. (See here.) Therefore, should I be shocked when the families I envied are broken?

For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,
Romans 8:23

My comparisons are bad enough, but they are even worse when my standard is a Christmas letter.

Do Christmas letters encourage you or discourage you?

Christmas

Something To Read

December 2nd, 2023
Mollie T. Cox

I liked the gift guidance given in the rhyme h ere.

Early on, I read that children respect books more if they are considered worthy of being a gift. Because I wanted books valued, books as gifts have been present (pun intended) in our house since the children were preschoolers.

Which books were gift-worthy? Hardbacks of books repeatedly checked out from the library: Ox Cart Man, The Four Seasons of Brambly Hedge, and the Winnie-the-Pooh Treasury—the last two were expensive for causal buying.

Unusual books that represented a child’s interest and not available at the local library. I purchased Harry’s Helicopter by George Ancona after my kindergartner asked me to teach him to fly a helicopter.

“I don’t know how,” I said.

“Just read a book and tell me what to do, and I’ll do it,” he replied.

Oh, for him to have that faith in my abilities now!

My sons have carried on the tradition. They thoughtfully choose at least one book for my husband each Christmas.

Any favorite book gifts?