Decisions | Page 2 of 11

We Can Do Hard Things

January 24th, 2026
Mollie T. Cox

Classroom sign my son made for his students.

I’ve survived hard things such as traveling through heavy snow only to reach deserted, ice-covered roads as well as caring for young cousins in a foreign country where I didn’t know the language. (The children didn’t either.)

I used to think that hard things were newsworthy or unusual or perhaps scary like the two mentioned above. In other words, hard things were HARD. Now I know better.

Each of us has our own, particular, everyday hard. A few hard things my family accomplished during 2025:

I sent over 100 Christmas cards, most purchased before Christmas 2020. Sending cards was just “too hard” previous years.

My husband cooked an enormous pork roast that had lingered in my freezer. Every time I saw it, I thought, “That’s too hard for today.”

I scheduled long-overdue doctor’s appointments. It had been “too hard” to clear my schedule and navigate the appointment maze.

Our family made nine exhausting, round trips to North Carolina via I-95 and I-85. Not to mention the I-40 nightmare.

What is hard for 2026? Sticking to The Mission. (See here.)

What hard things are you accomplishing?

Decisions

Is This Part of the Mission?

January 17th, 2026
Mollie T. Cox

Months ago, my husband and I went to a community walking event. We are part of our county walking club, and it seemed like a good way to spend a few retirement hours. It wasn’t. As we walked across the parking lot after leaving the event early, we made a decision. Before undertaking activities that seemed enticing, we would ask ourselves Is this part of the mission.

What is my mission? Loving the people in my life, especially the youngest and oldest. Writing projects that have been on hold for years. Some are pressing. Others are very pressing. It’s been two years since I was asked to write a sequel that could have been completed in months. Obligations and non-obligations have pulled me away.

What is my husband’s post-retirement mission? Supporting my work and getting our thirty-three-year-old home ready for sale. He’s checked off a few things.

Long ago, a friend said, “I feel the breath of sixty on my neck.” Well, forty years later, I am feeling the breath of seventy on my neck. It’s past time to define the mission and stick to it.

So, what is the mission?

Christmas, Decisions

Christmas Adaptations

December 13th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

One day, if my husband and I live long enough, we’re not going to be able to put up a tree at Christmas. My sadness at that realization used to make me feel materialistic or overly secular. However, as my husband and I age, I view my Christmas ornaments the same way I view my photo albums. They are visual reminders of the people and places in our lives.

The past five years, I have warned that a particular day was coming and this year it arrived. My family purchased an artificial tree. I’ve taken to heart the principle of simplifying instead of giving up. (See here and here.)

The energy we spent on choosing, transporting, setting up, vacuuming fallen needles, adding lights, attempting to hang ornaments on uneven or weak branches and watering—as well as arguing about all the previous steps—is now devoted to hanging ornaments. More ornaments than we have hung in the past decade. My heart is happy as I reflect on the memories they represent.

Christmas is a box of ornaments that have become part of the family. Charles Schultz

PS Our simplified deck decorations for 2025

Decisions, Homeschooling, Parenting

Advice Versus Experience

November 8th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

I don’t believe in advice. I offer experience and hope.
Tracee Ellis Ross

I don’t believe much in advice either, Tracee. Along the way, I’ve received too much from people who have no knowledge or have never walked in my footsteps. (I remember both the humor and the hurt from those situations.)

I’m also guilty. Long ago and far away, I chose a new homeschool curricula. It was computer based and made my life easier while my family cared for my mother. Within weeks, I was recommending my discovery to other families. By the end of the year, I was pointing out the curricula’s faults and giving different advice. My friends needed my seasoned experience—not my untested advice.

Even seasoned experience has not stopped others or me from giving and receiving bad advice.

What do I wish we all knew before sharing experiences and offering hope? To ask questions first to see our experiences are helpful.

Never miss a good chance to shut up. Will Rogers

Decisions, Priorities

Emptying My Accounts

November 1st, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

I thought I’d never let my account get down to zero. I certainly wouldn’t have an overdraft—except that is what I did this year and last. I did it generously and without considering the consequences because the needs of those around me were great. I also didn’t know the needs would be ongoing.

I’m not talking about my bank account because I do understand future expenses and unexpected emergencies. I’m talking about my physical and emotional reserves. In some ways, emptying my well-being account is worse. One son regularly reminds me that my health is my greatest asset.

I didn’t consider budgeting my energy—in all forms—because I underestimated how hard replenishment would be and how quickly I would need a positive balance.

Why did I know not to spend all my money helping others with their emergencies and yet not show healthy restraint with regard to spending myself? Perhaps I was too optimistic that crises would resolve? Perhaps the lack of experience of being in my sixties?

I’m learning. I’m also learning the truth of the quote below.

Help someone, you earn a friend. Help someone too much, you make an enemy.
Erol Ozan