Priorities | 100 Words

Emptying My Accounts

November 1st, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

I thought I’d never let my account get down to zero. I certainly wouldn’t have an overdraft—except that is what I did this year and last. I did it generously and without considering the consequences because the needs of those around me were great. I also didn’t know the needs would be ongoing.

I’m not talking about my bank account because I do understand future expenses and unexpected emergencies. I’m talking about my physical and emotional reserves. In some ways, emptying my well-being account is worse. One son regularly reminds me that my health is my greatest asset.

I didn’t consider budgeting my energy—in all forms—because I underestimated how hard replenishment would be and how quickly I would need a positive balance.

Why did I know not to spend all my money helping others with their emergencies and yet not show healthy restraint with regard to spending myself? Perhaps I was too optimistic that crises would resolve? Perhaps the lack of experience of being in my sixties?

I’m learning. I’m also learning the truth of the quote below.

Help someone, you earn a friend. Help someone too much, you make an enemy.
Erol Ozan

Decisions, Priorities

What Should We Do?

September 27th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

Our family has been swirling in activity since the beginning days of 2025. Why? Because crisis after crisis erupted. We asked,

What can we do to help?

when the proper question was

What should we do to help?

It’s hard to think about personal limitations and setting long-term expectations when loved ones are drowning, but as my husband was taught in a lifeguarding class, a drowning person’s first instinct is to drown the rescuer.

As the year ages, we’ve been able to escape with our much wiser lives and realize “can” does not mean “should.” It’s easier to back off when the stakes are low, but as we, friends, and relatives age, the stakes become higher.

He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice and to love kindness and to walk humbly with you God? Micah 6:8

Priorities

Spending Time Doing Nothing

September 20th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

What have I been learning along the way?

“Nothing” can trump “Something.”

As a child, sitting outside at night beside my grandmother—just sitting—while she and my mother and aunts talked was the best part of a day.

Sitting—just sitting—by the sandbox while my great-nephews dug in the sand was the best part of a day.

Sitting on top of Blackrock in the Shenandoah National Park and looking at cloud formations during a sunset was the best part of a day.

People watching at a mall and walking through a local library—even when we were in St. Johns, Newfoundland for only a few hours—was better than touring an historic tourist site.

Watching the stars would have been superior to attending the cruise ship’s evening program.

Looking at the ship’s wake would have been superior to watching the cooking demonstration and the galley tour.

What do I wish I knew?

The best way to do Nothing so it doesn’t become Something because late September has excellent weather for doing Nothing.

Are you good at doing Nothing?

Priorities

What Do I Really Need?

August 30th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

Sometimes I know what I really want (see here). What I wish I had known was what I really needed. Along the way—as in over the summer—I learned that activities I considered selfish wants were important needs.

Spring and Summer events stripped me of all of the following for significant stretches of time.

Bicycling

Conversations with friends

Library visits

My flowers / yard / woods

Reading for enjoyment (actually almost all reading)

Solitude

Swimming

Time with my sons

Walks

Worship with other believers

Each loss took a different toll on my mental and physical health. Combined, it was too much for too long.

What have my husband and I learned? Another’s crisis must be at an extreme level before we travel on a Sunday and miss Worship. Caring for our mental and physical health takes many forms. All aspects of good health are a need—not a want—and must be prioritized.

Are you learning your needs?

Decisions, Priorities

What Is Big? What Is Little?

July 12th, 2025
Mollie T. Cox

It depends.

Devil’s Den was the site of a major Gettysburg Battle on July 2, 1863. However, during multiple family trips to Gettysburg beginning in the 1990s, Devil’s Den was not a “must see.”

Why?

It was a pile of stones. Seemingly, unimpressive stones.

Devil’s Den (DD), left of me, as seen from Little Round Top (LRT).

Little Round Top, the site of a major Gettysburg battle on the same date, was impressive. My family visited Little Round Top during each Gettysburg trip.